To coincide with the release of her sublime and revealing new EP what i didn’t get to say, we caught up with pop and soul singer and songwriter Amanda Aponte, to find out more about the music, the writing process, the emotions behind the songs, and how things have changed over the past year. Here’s the conversation in full.
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Hi Amanda – great to catch up with you, and massive congratulations for the stunning new EP. For those new to your music, who or what first inspired you to write songs, and how did you perfect your unique vocal style?
Hi! Thanks, it’s so great to chat with you as well.
I started singing when I was around seven, and I grew up listening to a lot of powerhouse female pop artists like Celine Dion and Christina Aguilera. I would constantly challenge myself to keep up with them vocally, and I began to love performing and got into musical theatre in elementary school.
That turned into writing my own songs when I was around 19 years old. My grandpa is also a singer, so having that shared love of music with him has always meant a lot to me.
What’s the story behind this EP – why this title, and what connects the songs within?
This EP kind of came out of nowhere. I lived in California from last September to March, and those months were some of the hardest of my life mentally. I was struggling with heartbreak and completely lost who I was. I hit rock bottom and didn’t even have the motivation to write anymore.
“Leaving California was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever made. I left a place I had so many dreams for, and a person I thought I couldn’t live without.”
When I moved back to my childhood home, I started writing all the things I wished I had said to this person. That’s where the title comes from. Each song became a different stage of grief, and writing them gave me the closure I never received. I realized I had to give that closure to myself.
Now, months later, I’m in such a different place, more healed, more grounded. Even though I wish things had ended differently, I’m grateful for the music that came from that pain.
Where in the process did “intro” come, and what made you want to keep things so simple yet enchanting with the pure vocal layering?
I always wanted intro to be simple and to represent what my life felt like in California. I like to refer to it as “the storm.” The instrumentation resembles a tornado or rainstorm to me, and the vocal layering mirrors the internal chaos I was living in. I wanted it to be the opening track so listeners could step into my world in the exact order that everything happened.
You get quite vulnerable and refreshingly honest with some of these songs. Tell me about the move from “finding me” to “love letter to me.” What was the writing process like, and what do you hope people take away from these moments?
I wanted each song to cover a different part of my healing journey. finding me was the first glimmer of hope I felt when I moved back home. I wrote each song at the exact moment I felt a shift emotionally, and both finding me and love letter to me came from moments of happiness or confidence, even if those moments came in waves.
I hope listeners can connect with the fact that healing isn’t linear. It’s good waves and bad waves, and we have to sit with the good ones and appreciate them when they come.
Self–love is a lifelong journey for most of us, and I wanted to highlight both the beauty and the difficulty of that process.
Did you play the piano and guitar for this and then produce the tracks around those organic moments, or did you get a producer on board? How did things come to be?
For most of the EP, I found the instrumentals through different producers online. For lavender (lovebug) and what goes around comes back around, I asked my good friend Julie Hess to help create the tracks. I shared my vision with her, and she brought it to life so beautifully.
Is live performance on the cards in the near future? What can fans expect from your live shows?
I’m so excited to perform these songs live. I’m currently planning my move back to Nashville, where I went to college, and I plan to perform the songs at writers’ rounds and shows out there next year. I’d also love to mix in some of my favorite covers and add some upbeat, happy songs to the set.
If you could only play one song from the EP to a new listener, which would you choose, and why?
This is such a tough question because my answer changes all the time, but I’d probably say what goes around comes back around. It’s my favorite on the EP because of its rawness and melodic feel. I also love lavender (lovebug), those two are definitely my go–tos for introducing someone to my music.
What’s changed for you the most since last year’s Lipstick Lesbian release, and what’s been the biggest lesson you’ve learned — about yourself or about building a career as a modern artist?
Honestly, so much has changed. Lipstick Lesbian was an era where I felt extremely confident and like the best version of myself, but I had no idea the second half of 2024 would completely flip my world upside down and make me lose that confidence temporarily.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned is to trust myself more and to let God and the universe do their thing. If something or someone is meant for me, it won’t pass me by. And if something leaves my life, I shouldn’t chase it.
My favorite quote as of recent is “Rejection is God’s protection,” and I 1000% stand by that. I feel really confident in the artist I’ve become this year, and I’m proud of how much my writing has grown.
Is there anything else we should know?
Despite how painful this chapter was, I’m incredibly grateful that this EP came out of it. It means so much to see how many people have connected with these songs. I’ll continue putting in the work every day to grow and to keep doing what I love, making music and singing.
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